Picken, Picken, and more Picken.....

Everywhere I turn this week someone is picking. Nose pickers at every stop and every turn.  There are the pickers who flick it , the pickers who carefully inspect it, and the pickers who wipe it on their britches. There are the pickers who ever so slyly eat it, that's right...Eat it, and the dainty ones who pick it from beneath their nails and eventually wipe it on a tissue, which...by the way..should have been used to begin with. They are at stop lights, on the freeway, in crosswalks, grocery store checkout lines. Even in their office cubicles.  Pickers!

Pickers of Seats.  No not picking a seat to sit in...the other kind,  picking their pants and undies and whatever else ails them out of their butt cracks. They are picking, pulling and tugging. Subtly and not so subtly lifting their skirts and dresses to free the wedgie, or stuffing their sausage fingers down their greased stained jeans to itch and pick the not so comfortable behind. Could it be an atomic wedgie, a poorly fitted thong, a remnant piece of toilet paper? Whatever the cause, take it into the stall people. There is nothing subtle about picking your ass in public.

And of course...we can never overlook the ever wonderful and oh so appetizing scab pickers.  Sit on a Max line for more than 5 minutes and your bound to see one.  Someone picking at their scabs. Scratching, peeling, pick..pick...Pick. Aha, got it, and now the ooze and blood.  They either flick the scab, like the afore mentioned booger picker, or they eat it. And as for the blood, well much akin to a vampire, most chose to lick the blood or suck on  the wound until it stops.  Ever so appealing and appetizing to observe. Scab pickers are fascinating because, unlike other pickers, they will share how "gnarly" that was with their friends and those around them. Subtlety is not a requirement.

I think I might have discovered a new diet craze.  Its called the Picker Diet. Look for pickers in their various forms and observe them in their native habitats and.....**poof**....instant weight loss. Loss of appetite is guaranteed. Side effects may include vomiting, queasiness, and nightmares.