Trust

I’m not upset that you lied to me, I’m upset that from now on I can’t believe you” – Friedrich Nietzsche

For some people, trust comes as easy as breathing. And then there are others that require substantial proof and take a much longer time to give it. I refuse to use the term “faith” in this case because i see it as something that is entirely in a different level than trust. Faith is consistent. Faith is unwavering and unquestionable. Faith is deeply rooted; embedded in your very being. If you have faith in someone, that means that no matter the trials thrown your way, your faith is still intact and more often than not, this is what you hold on to, look forward to, and rely on to get yourself out of the muck. Faith means hope. It gives you the needed reassurance that surely tomorrow will be better; it consoles you to keep on going because it promises a certain reprieve. If faith can talk, it would probably tell you, “Hey, stop sulking already, you know he will never let you down.” It is hard to develop this kind of blind devotion in life, but if you have true faith, it can always be depended upon to set you straight in times of confusion.

Trust however is a different matter altogether. Unlike its unshakable older sibling faith, it can easily be toppled down and lost. We can even say that trust is only secondary or the middle stages of faith. First, it starts with belief- the youngest or can be liken as the newborn baby of the three. Belief is merely acceptance of something or someone with only the littlest or even no expectations. It is simply acknowledgment without attachment. Like a newborn that hardly notices or cares if his toy is replaced by another as long as he has something to be occupied with. In the eyes of a newborn, everything is the same as long as it catches his fancy. Anything will do- be it a toy, a piece of colorful embroidered blanket, a reachable thumb that feels amazing to latch on to or even several funny faces.

Trust on the other hand, is more complex and more personal. It is believing in something or someone and relying on them as you seek understanding, secrecy, comfort, and intimacy. Like an adolescent, trust is bumbling, stumbling and highly reactant to its surroundings or environment. In order to maintain it, there must be consistency in actions and deeds- a steady impetus feeding its growth. If trust is relatively new, lacking a long standing history of good deeds and memories, then it is much more fragile and apt to be lost. A single catastrophic deed can quickly banish it. If it has years of good relationship in its reserve, then it can be termed as relatively stronger in its resistance to trying situations but it may still be lost just the same. The survival and healing of trust becomes dependent on the strength and courage of  the giver but also is impacted by the extent or the magnitude of the fault done to that person. There are those who have a high degree of tolerance and patience and the ability to forgive, but then again, it is still dependent on the mistake that shattered the trust to begin with.

No matter the situation, trust should never be taken for granted. Forgiveness may eventually ensue after a fight but that doesn’t mean that trust can just be as easily restored. You may smile and say that everything’s okay now but that doesn’t mean that it didn’t leave a dent. 

Trust may be difficult and even impossible to regain after losing it so don’t do something that may lose it in the first place. The point remains that to be given trust is an opportunity to love and be loved in return. Losing trust is like throwing away love. Being trusted is a privilege given only to a chosen few so don’t waste it.

Regret is a pretty hard companion to live with.

“Trust is a fragile thing - difficult to build, easy to break. It cannot be bargained for. Only if it is freely given it can be expected in return” 

"Trust is a fragile thing, Easy to Break, easy to lose and Very hard to get back."

"Trust can take a lifetime to build, seconds to destroy, and eternity to gain back."

"Trust is like a piece of paper, once crumpled it can never be perfect again."

"Trust is very fragile and has to be really taken care of when given to you. It should never be given to everybody just like a smile that can be given to everyone. Because once it’s broken, hundreds of smiles won’t fix it."